Tag Archives: butch

Femme Eye for the Butch Gui

TheSartorialist.com features women's and men's fashion shot on the street. The photographer has a great eye for androgyny.

Because women, in general, are assailed at every turn with feminine fashion images and opportunities for style consumerism, femme lesbians naturally have more fashion resources than butches do. It’s tough to find good butch fashion advice, and even tougher to find images of butch women in mainstream fashion media. So what’s a fashion-forward, or at least fashion-leaning, butch to do?

Here are six of tips of my own and some of my favorite fashion resources I like to share with the butches I know and love. Please share your own tips and resources in the comments.

Continue reading

Femme Boxers? Knock Me Out!

This limited edition print by artist Koren Shadmi would look great over a certain butch’s bed…

Cute Butches with Animals

A butch teamed up with a soft fuzzy animal is an overload of  sexual energy and cuteness that makes my teeth ache. Check out this new project by Kristen (the lucky she of Sugarbutch fame) and consider it dessert.

Lesbian Barbershop Poster

From DIS Magazine comes the W4W Buzz, a lesbian visibility barbershop poster. This graphic salute to all the women who sit in line with the men to plunk themselves into a vinyl chair every four weeks, can be purchased here (scroll down on the jump to read the essay that accompanies the poster).

You just know it would be a great holiday gift for someone on your list. You could pack it with a tin of Clubman Talc.

Steaming Hot: Kimberly Dark’s “Dykeotomy”

A while ago, I had the deep, deep pleasure of seeing one of Kimberly Dark‘s spoken word performances in San Francisco. This powerful femme goddess held the room transfixed: butches, femmes, and everyone on every part of the gender/sexuality identity spectrum was sitting up and paying attention. Some were even straightening their ties and squirming in their seats. Check out the calendar on her website and if you have any opportunity to see one of her performances – run, don’t walk, to get a ticket.

These are some highlights from her one-woman show, “Dykeotomy”:

Can’t Be Trusted with a Two-Piece

One of the varied and delightful thrills of my weekend was settling in to listen to author Ivan E. Coyote’s story “No Bikini” on the Public Radio International show Selected Shorts.

As you may already know, I’m a big fan of Ivan’s work, both the essays and short stories (many of which you can read in her monthly column archive on Canada’s gay and lesbian news site, Xtra.ca), and her novel, Bow Grip.

Ivan’s voice, inflection, and sense of humor add such richness to her readings that I had trepidation about the broadcast because I knew it would be performed by an actor, not by Ivan herself. (Nobody gets to read their own stuff on Selected Shorts.) “No Bikini” was read by Sonia Manzano, another well-loved voice, since she is best known for playing the role of “Maria” on Sesame Street.

The broadcast made reference to a short film based on the story and said it would be available on the Selected Shorts website. I searched all over the place and couldn’t find the film there, but eventually located it on YouTube. This version has some non-English subtitles, but after the 15 seconds or so, you won’t notice them (unless you need them).

PRI’s Selected Shorts is available as a free podcast. “No Bikini” appeared in the episode released on April 26, titled “Fiction Into Film”.

I think that with Ivan’s permission, someone should make t-shirts that say “Can’t Be Trusted with a Two-Piece”.

Brandee’s Last Dance

Original fiction:

“Damn!”

Brandee looked up from her book at the clock duct-taped to the wall above the cracked, lipstick-smeared mirror.

“It can’t be time to do it again.”

She glanced around the empty dressing room, strewn with pizza boxes and coffee cups. Stockings hung over a pipe that ran along the wall. A rolling wardrobe rack held an odd assortment of bits of lingerie, leather, a white vinyl nurse’s uniform, a silk kimono, and a fuzzy chenille bathrobe. The space heater humming away under the counter just barely eased the chill in the air and kept condensation from forming on the whitewashed cinderblock walls. Brandee kicked off her fleece boots and slipped into the purple satin heels that sat on the floor by her chair. She pulled one knee into her chest, stretching out her leg and hip, and then the other. Then standing, she leaned into the mirror, swiped on another coat of lipgloss, and headed for the stage. Continue reading

Coloring Contest Winners

Quite some time ago, I post a coloring contest in honor of this site’s 2nd birthday.

Christine Phillips of the The Erotic Lesbian Coloring Book illustrated a story from my archives, and we invited you to color it and send it in.

We got a lot of cool entries. Here are the three that we thought stood out. The drawing illustrates my short story, “Following the Thread,” which is actually pretty tame. Christine chose it when we discovered we have a mutual love of The Cowboy Junkies.

Christine’s illustration made my tame story hotter, and each of these three finalists added something more.

First Place

Big Brain Girl added tattoos and moody coloring, turning up the temperature:

WINNER MelissaStone copy

.

Second Place

Elizabeth B. was the only person who colored her entry in the old school style. She earned special merit for that:

SECOND EB#2 copy.

Third Place

Tomboy Tigress added a note of realism with a brick wall:

THIRD TomboyT copy.

Thank you everybody!

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Another Butch Voice – Ivan Coyote Speaks Up

Back at the end of August, I wrote about my experiences as a femme ally at the Butch Voices conference held in Oakland. That first post, and the ones that came after, engendered a few comments. (You can read the posts here.)

This month, on Canada’s queer website, Xtra.ca, the site’s monthly columnist, author Ivan Coyote talks about her experiences at the conference. This is well worth reading.

The room smelled like hair wax and Old Spice deodorant and cigarette smoke caught in clothes.

There was the clunk of shitkicker boots and the creak of leather jackets and talking. Always there was talking.

I was in the conference room of a hotel in downtown Oakland, at the first-ever Butch Voices conference.

Read more on Xtra.

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So Many Powerful Words

We heard so many powerful words spoken during the Butch Voices conference.

I thought I would share these with you.

Keynote speaker Jeanne Cordova gave a keynote address “Keeping Our Feminism, While Exploring our Masculinities”.

A self-described “classic butch,” (that’s “classic” as in “classic coke,” not coke-light, or no-caffeine, or coke-zero – make no mistake) Cordova is an activist, social pioneer, and writer. She is the author of  Sexism: It’s A Nasty Affair! A collection of columns printed in the Los Angeles Free Press (New World Enterprises, 1976); Kicking the Habit – A Lesbian Nun Story (Multiple Dimensions,1990), and the forthcoming  When We Were Outlaws: In Love & Revolution, memoir from a political activist. Her work has also appeared in numerous anthologies and publications.

She spoke about what it has meant to her to be butch and how that identity has meshed with feminism:

So I want to appeal to my fellow butches to take “this feminism thing” seriously. I want to appeal to you in the most basic, crude and self-centered way. By telling you – if you ever plan on keeping a woman past the hot-sex days of the first year of your relationship, if you ever plan on getting married, if you want a femme to stay with you, if you ever want to have a happy, long-term relationship with a woman today – you’d better learn your feminism!

You can read the rest of Cordova’s keynote address on her website.

……..

Sunday at the conference featured a Spoken Word Brunch featuring poets and authors, and other spoken word artists reading their work. I think I speak for everyone in the room when I say the performances rocked us to the roots of our souls.

Hosted by author and comic Kelli Dunham, the brunch was a mixture of young and old, the political and the erotic, the folksy and the oratory. We heard poetry and an a’cappella song by Shams Cohen, a full-time grad student preparing for Unitarian Universalist ministry; a story by author Elana Dykewomon, and a hot story celebrating a queer femme sex worker by Jeff Stroker.

Canadian author Ivan Coyote read an essay about packing in front of her mom and brought the room to tears with a not-so-simple story about a simple haircut. On Saturday night at the Butch Nation performance event, Ivan shared words from these two essays: A Butch Roadmap and Hats Off to Beautiful Femmes.

……..

Lex, a young transgender activist and spoken word artist brought the house down with three dynamic and intense pieces. If you visit Lex’s MySpace page, you can hear at least two of these pieces, “Intention,” and  “Dearly Beloved,” a poem about California’s recent struggle with Proposition 8, which had the audience hooting and cheering with these lines:

For what God has joined together

Let no man put asunder

With the power invested in me

by God herself and the state

of courageous hearts and unshattered commitments

I now pronounce you sacred

……..

Belinda Carroll is a Texas-based comic, and an outspoken femme. She took a serious turn and shared her poem, “An Ode to the Masculine”:

At night I dream about a person of ambiguous gender,

aggressive as well as gentle.

A person that gets my love of shoes but won’t take any of my shit.

A person that is tough, steadfast, and quick,

can admit when they are wrong, but mostly when I am right.

Has a soft shoulder for me at night.

Someone who fights, wrestles, and screams

for a place in the world, and to be seen

as a person loving, whole –

not to be seen as other,

but as a soul.

It’s not, are you he?

Or, are you her?

Or what?

because it really matters not.

As long as you are in full body contact with

your humanity,

you are free to be

with me.

……..

Many of these artists have books, essays, and poems in publications as well as FaceBook and/or MySpace pages, websites, and Twitter accounts and you should get to know their work!

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Femmes Aren’t Straight Girls Who Took A Wrong Turn

I spent the weekend at the Butch Voices conference in Oakland. It was an amazing weekend, with many insightful and joyful moments. (More about the conference here.)

I realized today that I was really happy I wasn’t PMS-ing during the conference. There were so many touching moments, and I found myself tearing up so many times, that I’m sure if I was on the downside of a progesterone spike, I could have cried all the way through the weekend.

But there was a moment during the conference that left me thinking my ears had deceived me and I want to talk about it.

I was in a workshop discussion between Jack Halberstam and Kim Peirce. Jack (Judith) is an English professor and director of The Center for Feminist Research at USC. Kim is the director of Boys Don’t Cry.

The discussion was about moving beyond Boys Don’t Cry into a next generation of butch/trans/genderqueer representation in the media. Jack and Kim are friends. In fact, Kim pointed out that Jack set her up on her only blind date, resulting in her current engagement.

At some point during the conversation, when comments and questions were moving quickly, Kim said something to the effect that butches have superior qualities to men and “that’s why femmes are with us and not men”.

Uh, no.

(Jack, why the hell didn’t you call her on this?)

I almost jumped out of my chair, but the moment to comment without rewinding the whole conversation had passed. Instead, I got distracted mulling it over and soon left the discussion and retired to my hotel room to rant a little.

There are many ways I think butches have it hands down over men. (And don’t write and call me a man-hater. Preferring one doesn’t mean hating the other.)

But that’s not why I’m with a butch woman and not a man. I’m with a butch woman because I’m a lesbian who loves butch women (and what butch/genderqueer author Ivan Coyote called “largely estrogen-based lifeforms” that fall anywhere on the masculine spectrum).

I came out later in life, after having been in heterosexual marriage, and I keenly feel the results of my coming out process and my “choices”. (Which, let’s face it, weren’t exactly choices, but internal imperatives.)

Femmes aren’t straight girls who have been won over by butches. Ask any butch who tried such a conversion and lived though the pain of watching her beloved return to a life with men. Admittedly a few of these projects work, but the vast majority don’t seem to.

I dated one woman who experienced this so many times, we joked about her being the “back door” lesbian  – the last thing a straight girl saw on her way back to heterosexuality.

Femmes are lesbians, no less than butches. We are dykes, queers, and homos. We are your counterparts, the yin to your yang. We grow more feminine in your reflection, as you become butcher in our glow. We exist in tandem.

But make no mistake, our sexual agency is only as great as your own. We don’t choose you over men and you didn’t win us as prizes in some sort of competition.

We chose you because you’re not men.

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A Femme Surrounded by Butch Voices

I’m suffering from a sort of culture shock. I noticed it as soon as I left the hotel yesterday.

You see, I’ve long known this about myself: My head turns when I see certain men on the street. Maybe it’s the cut and hang of a leather jacket, the perfect fit of a pair of well-faded jeans, or the shine of a polished shoe or boot. I watch their stride, long and certain, and the way their hips move.  I admire the trim of their hair. And then I think, “Damn. If only you were a woman.”

Well, I’ve just returned from three days in heaven, from a place where the cut, the stride, the polish, and the trim belonged to butches of every shape and size. Whether trans-masculine, genderqueer, female-identified, old-school, or new, they were all represented.

My quivering femme heart will take a long time to still.

But, make no mistake, I wasn’t at the Butch Voices conference, held this past weekend at the Oakland Marriott, simply to ogle the participants. I was there as an ally, to lend my support. I was there to learn. I was there because I love butch women. Butch women are my friends, my confidants, and my lovers. I was there to say “thanks”.

Thanks for all the time you’ve offered me an arm. Thanks for making the bar runs at crowded parties. Thanks for loaning me your jacket, leading when we dance, cooking for me, wrapping me up in big authentic hugs, and letting me cry on your shoulder.

Thank you for the reverence and respect with which you’ve touched my body – sometimes with more regard than I was feeling for it myself.

I was there to say thanks for being the most visual icons of our lesbian sub-culture. Thank you for taking the public heat for all of us. In your roles as outlaws and gender-benders, you are our front-men.

From the moment we arrived, I was conscious of my role as a non-butch participant. I’m a buzz-cut, sort of low-maintenance femme, and I had anticipated this and didn’t want to spend days explaining my gender orientation. So I packed a dress, strappy sandals, and got a fresh pedicure in preparation. I wanted to be clear about my position, and not appear to be teetering on top of the fence.

Femmes were definitely in the minority and I chose my workshops carefully, not wanting to encroach on others’ opportunities for butch bonding. The public visibility of butch women led to such workshops as “Non-conforming Gender Presentation and Job Searching,” “Politics of Passing,” and “Butch in the Streets: Techniques for Increasing Safety in Public”.  I did not attend these. I attended S. Bear Bergman’s workshop on chivalry, and Ivan Coyote’s workshop on beating writing procrastination.  I did not attend the workshop called “An Exploration of Dick,” even though I have more than a passing acquaintance with the topic. Strap-ons and toys, are just that for me – toys. They’re not My Dick. (And that’s only one of the things that marks me as femme.) This was a conversation the butches needed to have amongst themselves. But to be clear, as a femme ally, I was never made to feel unwelcome. The places I didn’t go were by my own choice.

In response, I suppose, to the bonding and visibility of the assembled butches, I heard several young femme women express how they feel invisible to their own community – that they’re not immediately recognized as lesbian and have to work to be noticed by the very women they want to attract.

To some degree I understand this because my usual fashion accessory is a 12-year-old son, which identifies me as a mommy above all else. I think in liberal places and among my peers, I’m often read as a gay woman, but in many environments, I’m just an older orchestra mom with an edgy haircut and funky glasses.

And, I hear women over 40, lesbian and straight alike, complain about their invisibility to the world as a whole. They say younger people don’t look them in the eye, and until we become senior citizens, don’t extend us the courtesies they jump to extend to younger women. I suppose that’s a valid complaint in a society that places a high value on feminine youth and beauty. I think I circumvent this by going out of my way to make eye contact with strangers,  and I am more likely to extend my courtesies to others – male or female – as to expect them extended to me. As a result, I don’t feel invisible so much as capable, if by necessity. I’ve worked in lots of environments where I was expected to lift, tote, and carry, and have set-up and stacked more folding tables and chairs than I would ever like to count. My egalitarianism makes my life run smoothly but doesn’t make me feel special.

Maybe that’s why I came home from Butch Voices feeling like a queen.

Yes, I felt conspicuous in my femininity among all the butch bodies. Yes, I was in the minority.

But I felt seen, valued, and cared for. I felt nurtured. It never occurred to me to move a folding chair. I’m pretty certain it would have been an insult to try, and I’m not bothered by that one iota. I do my share in other environments and had nothing to prove in this one. Everyone I met was warm in their greetings, gracious in their communications, conscious of their impact on the space around them. I heard one femme woman say that at the Saturday night Butch Nation entertainment review – which was jam-packed – she had never had so many people apologize for bumping into her.

Maybe this is because of the special pride so many butch women take in their manners. Maybe this is because we have all been socialized as female to some degree, and therefore have a special understanding of the value of warmth and courtesy.

In the past, I have told my son that if he wants to learn good manners and treat women with respect, he only has to look to his butch “uncles” for advice. And after this weekend, I stand by that now, more than ever.

My heartfelt thanks to Joe LeBlanc, the conference chair and Butch Voices board president, and the incredible group that put the conference together.

Here are all of the posts I made following the Butch Voices 2009 conference.

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Hello, Hot Butches!

Finally, the unveiling of the site we’ve been waiting for: Top Hot Butches: The 100 hottest butch, masculine, androgynous, genderqueer, transmasculine, studs, AGs, dykes, queers, and transguys, a project by Sinclair Sexsmith, the kinky queer butch top behind Sugarbutch Chronicles.

Sinclair conceived of this project as response to other “hot lesbian” lists that only serve to point up the notable lack of butch, masculine, andro, AG, stud, and trans visibility in mainstream lesbian culture. As Sinlair once pointed out, an AfterEllen list of the “15 Hottest Butches,” published nearly two years ago, featured mostly butch film and television characters. That is to say, the “Hottest Butches” they listed, were mostly fictional, played by (mostly straight) actresses.

I was delighted to be invited to be part of the judges panel on the project, along with Femme is my Gender, Kristen, Leo MacCool, and Rodger. I think the end result is a fantastic and diverse mix of the smart, queer, funny, attractive, and talented.

This list is a resource. It’s a reminder that while society continues to celebrate the idealized feminine – even in lesbian culture, damn it – the people taking the road less traveled through the spectrum of gender will always be the most visible members of our community. For that, gay and queer women everywhere owe each of the people on this list a debt of gratitude.

Thanks, Sinclair, for bringing this project to life.

Check out the 100 at TopHotButches.com.

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Steam

A short story

teapotcup

Finally back in her hotel room, Claire kicked off her shoes and sat down at the little table. She put her feet on the edge of the bed. It had been a long day and everything ached. Her feet hurt from being pushed into business shoes all day, and her neck was cramped from sleeping on the plane. Her right hand reached up to rub it, and she rolled her head, pressing her fingers into the tight cord at the back edge of her neck.

“Levator scapulae.” The words popped into her head involuntarily as her fingers rubbed back and forth across the muscle fibers.

She looked at the pile of business cards she had dumped onto the table. Every handshake brought a card, and after her presentation at the plenary session, it seemed like she had collected hundreds.

A lavender card near the bottom of the the heap caught her eye and she pulled it out. This one had been in her pocket when she left Chicago. The logo was a triangle, and scrawled across it, words that said “Meg’s: Soak, steam, sauna. Women only since 1996.”

When she said she was heading to the conference in Santa Barbara, one of the other associate professors had flipped it onto her desk. Claire knew her colleague was also lesbian, although she tried to stay out of the personal lives of the women in her department.

“I went to graduate school in California and this old lover of mine opened a women’s bath house in Santa Barbara,” the woman said.

Claire cringed inwardly at her co-worker’s casual use of the word “lover”.

“It’s a nice place and you’ll feel comfortable,” she continued. “You look like you could use a break. Might as well make the most of this trip.”

Claire turned the card over.  “Make a reservation and tell Meg I sent you” was inked on the back.

Claire looked at the clock. It was after 8 p.m. Most of the conference crowd had headed out to dinner after the cocktail reception. She was worn out, and had come back to her room, thinking a hot bath and an early night would be just the thing. She walked into the bathroom and eyed the small, shallow tub and the vinyl shower curtain. The bathroom lights were bright enough for dissection. She flipped them off and the room became pitch black. There was nothing in between.

A moment passed as she thought about her choices, then she stalked back to the table and picked up the card. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she dialed the phone.

“Meg’s,” a voice answered.

“I’d like to make a reservation,” Claire said.

“For a tub room or a massage?’ the voice asked.

“Can I get a massage tonight?”

“No. I’m sorry. We book our last appointments at 8 p.m.”

“How about a tub room then?”

“I can do that if you get right over here,” the voice said.

“Is this Meg?” Claire asked.

There was a pause. “It is. Do we know each other?”

“No,” Claire said. “But Kat Donnelly said I should say she sent me when I made my reservation.”

There was a low chuckle. “She did, did she? How do you know Kat?”

“I work with her in Chicago. She gave me your card.”

“Well, then. Take your time. Any friend of Kat’s is a friend of mine.”

Claire threw a few things in a bag, slipped her shoes back on, shrugged into her suit jacket, and headed out the door. Always cautious, she rattled the doorknob of her hotel room three times before striding down the hall to the elevators.

As it turned out, Meg’s was just a short ride away.

The cab pulled up in front of a low building, surrounded by a cedar fence. A pair of twisted juniper bushes guarded either side of a Japanese moon gate at the entrance. A small plaque on the gate said simply “Meg’s”.

Claire passed through the gate and followed the wooden walkway. The noise of the street softened behind her, and she was aware of the gurgling of water, and crossing a small stream. She opened the door and stepped inside.

Even in the lobby, the air was warm and humid. The air smelled like cedar and other things Claire couldn’t quite identify.

The woman at the counter was helping another customer, a woman with wet hair, dressed in cozy sweat clothes.

“Oh, it was great Meg. Thank Terry again for the massage. My back feels better already.”

Claire looked down self-consciously at her black dress and jacket, and at her black pumps. Even though not very high-heeled, she felt formally conspicuous next to this relaxed patron in sweats and flip-flops.

The woman behind the counter turned toward Claire, fixing on her. “Can I help you?” she asked.

“I called a little while ago. I’m Claire from Chicago.”

“Ah. Come here then.”

The damp-haired woman passed her as she approached the counter, giving her a curious look before heading out the door.

Meg was a big woman with broad shoulders. Her dark hair was cut close to her head, with bangs that fell down over her forehead, like a schoolboy’s. She wore a tight black t-shirt and loose jeans. Claire couldn’t help but notice that her eyes were an arresting dark blue.

“So you’re Kat’s friend?”

“Co-worker. We were hired at the same time as assistant professors.”

“I see,” Meg said. “Are you in biology too?”

“Comparative anatomy,” Claire said.

“Are you and Kat…?” Meg’s voice fell away and she gave a meaningful tilt to her head.

“Oh no,” Claire said. “We don’t really socialize much, we just have offices in the same hall.”

Claire smoothed her hair behind her ears nervously.

“She used to live here,” Meg said.

“That’s what she said.”

“Did she say anything else?” Meg asked.

Claire suddenly felt like she was being called in front of the class to answer a question. She looked down at the counter.

Meg waited.

“She said you were an ex of hers.”

Again, the low chuckle she had heard on the phone.

“That’s one way of putting it. That didn’t shock you?”

“No,” said Claire. “Kat’s always upfront like that. At least more so than I am.”

“What does that mean?” Meg asked.

“Well, you know. Out. I’m not closeted, but since I’m not partnered, no one seems to give my personal life any thought. And, I guess I don’t offer them much to think about.”

Again, Meg fixed her with an appraising gaze. “I see,” she said. “Let’s get you to a tub room.”

She parted a cloth curtain printed with flying cranes. “Follow me.”

They walked down a dim hallway. The floor was covered with thick carpeting and, except for the low flute music that seemed to float on the air throughout the building, it was quiet.

Meg stopped in front of a doorway. “This is our Bay Laurel Room,” she said. “it’s my favorite.”

“It’s so quiet here,” Claire whispered.

Meg spoke in a low voice but stopped short of whispering. “We close at 9 p.m. on weeknights. You’re our last customer. Terry is finishing a massage, but you’re the last person in the spa.”

Meg pushed the door open and Claire gasped. “It’s so beautiful. I had no idea.”

The walls and floor of the room were covered in pale jade green tiles. A bubbling hot tub was built into a cedar platform, and shoji panels slid open to look over a Japanese-style garden lit by stone lanterns. Claire could see koi in the garden’s pond, just under the water’s surface.

“If it’s too cold in here, I can close the sliders,” Meg said.

“No, no. Please leave them open. The garden is so pretty and it makes me feel like I’m on an exotic vacation.”

“Aren’t you on vacation?” Meg asked.

“No. I’m just here speaking at a conference. I’m only staying tonight. I have to fly out tomorrow evening. It’s so fast, I’ll barely know I was gone.”

“Well, that’s no fun,” Meg said. “But maybe this will make it better. We’ll be around late this evening, doing some maintenance. You hang out as long as you’d like. Like I said, any friend of Kat’s is a friend of ours.”

She gave Claire a quick tour of the amenities, including how to operate the sauna. Then she opened a cabinet and removed several candles, placing them around the room.

“I only do this for special guests, after hours,” she said. “Fire marshall’s rules.”

After lighting them, she dimmed the room lights and poured Claire a cup of tea, handing it to her with a slight bow at the waist. “This is our house blend. It’s supposed to be relaxing and a little euphoric, but it’s all herbal.”

The tea smelled heavenly.

Meg walked over to the tub and bent down to check the temperature. As she reached for the thermometer, her t-shirt slipped up and the waistband of her pants slid down a little, revealing a black leather belt with studs, around her hips, under her clothes. There was no mistaking it for anything but a harness.

Claire felt her stomach flip a little.

“If you need anything, there are bell buttons around the room,” Meg said, pointing them out. “Either Terry or I will be happy to bring you more tea, towels… anything you need.”

Claire’s gaze involuntarily dropped down to the front of Meg’s jeans and the bulge there.

“Claire?”

Her eyes jumped back up to the woman’s face. Meg looked like she was stifling a smile.

“Anything else?”

“No. This is great, thanks.”

Meg slipped out of the room, closing the door softly behind her.

Claire unfastened her necklace and watch and dropped them in her jacket pocket. She hung her jacket on a hook and slipped out of her shoes, placing them on a low shelf for that purpose. She peeled off her stockings and stuffed them into one of her shoes. Then reaching behind her head, she began to unzip her sleeveless dress. The zipper suddenly stopped.

“Shit,” Claire said, struggling with it behind her back. She pulled up gently and felt it move a little, then tried again to ease the zipper down. Again, it stopped. It was caught at that awkward point where she couldn’t quite reach it over her shoulders, and couldn’t reach it with her arms behind her back. “Shit, shit,” she said.

The dress wasn’t tight, but it was cut in a hourglass shape, and the still-zipped waist wouldn’t allow her to pull the dress down over her hips, or shimmy it up over her head. She had no choice but to call for help. She reach for the bell and had a sip of tea while she waited.

Within two minutes there was a knock at the door.

“Come in,” Claire said.

Meg looked puzzled when she saw her there, still wearing the black sheath dress.

“My zipper’s stuck,” Claire said.

Meg smiled broadly. “I think I can help with that. Turn around.”

Claire turned, feeling the other woman’s presence behind her.

“Here,” Meg said. “Hold the top of the zipper closed so it lies flat.”

Claire did as she was told. She felt Meg toying with the zipper, working it up and down.

“Damn. This thing is really caught,” Meg said. “I don’t want to break it.”

“You can pull a little harder,” Claire said. “I have a different dress to wear tomorrow and if it breaks, I’ll get it repaired when I get home.”

“Okay,” Meg said. “You asked for it.”

Claire put her hand against the wall to brace herself. Meg drew the zipper up, almost to the neckline, and jerked it back down again. There was a hitch and then the zipper slid down freely, below the line of Claire’s panties. The back of the dress fell open.

“Wow,” Meg said. “That’s one hell of a tattoo. I didn’t expect that from you, professor.”

“It’s usually private,” Claire said, a little embarassed. She felt Meg’s fingertip tracing the waves on her skin, and running along the serpent on her low back.

“This is some piece of art,” Meg said. “I like this part right here.” The palm of her hand pressed against Claire’s waist, and involuntarily, Claire shuddered.

They both froze for a moment, each waiting for a signal from the other.

“Is this okay?” Meg asked, sliding her hand around Claire’s waist, under her dress, and pressing it against the skin of her belly.

“Yes,” Claire said softly. She leaned back against Meg, back against her soft t-shirt and back against the hard bulge in her jeans.

“Would you like me to unfasten your bra while I’m here?” Meg asked.

“Please.”

Meg unhooked the fasteners and took a step back and pushed the dress and the bra straps off Claire’s shoulders in one motion. The dress and her bra pooled on the floor.

“I’ll hang these up,” Meg said. “Why don’t you get into the tub?”

Self-conscious and aware of her nudity, Claire slipped into the tub while Meg’s back was turned.

Meg poured her some more tea and placed the cup near the edge of the tub.

“I’ll ask Terry to get you some more,” she said, and reached for the bell.

Almost immediately, there was a soft knock at the door.

“Come in,” Meg said.

If Terry was surprised to see Meg in the room, she didn’t let on.

“What can I do for you?”

“We could use some more tea.”

Terry was younger than Meg, and slighter in build. She was ropey, with the forearms of someone who worked with her hands all day. She was wearing a white t-shirt and khaki shorts. She gave the two of them a knowing smile.

“Sure thing.”

While she was out of the room, Meg squatted down by the edge of the tub.

“Would you mind if Terry joined us?”

“Seriously?”

“I think you’d like her. She’s great with her hands.”

Claire thought of her sterile hotel room, and of her office back in Chicago, desk covered with unread papers. She thought of the cutting wind that assaulted her on the street. She looked through the steam, out over the warm, still garden, glowing in the night.

“You said I looked like I could use a vacation, right?”

“Right,” Meg said. “I think Terry and I could take you on one.”

At that moment Terry came back into the room, carrying the teapot.

“Would you like to hang out with us for a while and wind down?” Meg asked. “You’ve been at it all day. I mean, if it’s all right with Claire.”

Terry looked at Claire, waiting for her response.

“I’m a friend of Meg’s friend Kat in Chicago.”

“Why didn’t you say so?” Terry grinned. “Is it okay if I get in the tub?”

“Please do.”

“Let me grab some more towels,” Meg said.

Terry pulled off her t-shirt, revealing a flat belly and small, compact breasts with dark nipples. She stepped out of her shorts and tossed them aside, then slid into the water across from Claire.

Meg had changed into a cotton kimono while she was out of the room. She set a huge stack of towels down on the platform. “There’s enough that we can spread them out,” she said, grinning. Claire saw her set the leather harness down on a bench near the towels. “I thought we might need this later.”

Meg untied the robe and stepped down into the tub. She reached for Claire’s foot and began to massage it.

“Oh, god, that feels good,” Claire said. She felt Terry move alongside her.

“Here, Claire. Just float on your back and I’ll massage your neck in the water,” Terry said. “Meg will have your legs and feet, so you won’t sink. I think you’ll like it.”

With Terry encouraging her, Claire fell back and floated, her breasts and belly rising into the steam. She could hear the bubbling of the jets under the water, and all other sounds were blocked out. Terry’s strong hands supported her shoulders and the back of her neck, her fingertips beginning to probe the tight muscles there. Meg’s hands held both her feet, thumbs working into the arches.

Claire moaned as the women worked with expertise on the most tense and sore parts of her body, turning her in the warm water, sometimes holding her limbs, and sometimes floating her with the lightest touch. She drifted in and out, hanging right at the edge of sleep. The two women began to rock her gently, first like waves on the seashore, and then faster, until finally they were vibrating her relaxed body back to life. Meg gently set her feet back on the floor of the tub and Terry supported her as Claire stood in the chest-deep water.

“That was amazing. I really do feel like I was away on vacation.”

“That was just the first part of the trip,” Meg said, climbing out of the tub, and beginning to spread a thick layer of towels on the deck.

Terry took Claire by the hand and led her out of the water. She wrapped her in a towel and sat down by Meg. She patted the space next to her.

“Come sit with us, Claire. The night is still so young.”

Claire could see the edge of the moon beginning to rise above the garden wall. There was the far-off flute music, and the song of a cricket in the garden. The candles flickered in the cedar-scented steam as Claire lowered herself into the waiting arms of the two women. And just like that, the work and wind of Chicago began to fall away.

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When I say “Bush” I Still Don’t Mean George

Nearing the 100-day mark in the Obama presidency, the man’s popularity continues to surge.

Sam Fulwood III’s recent post on Politico.com points up this trend. He says “Barack Hussein Obama is the nation’s first hip president.”

As one example, he says Obama is so hip that even referencing him is hip:

School kids in Albany, N.Y., coined a term for it: “Baracking.” And it doesn’t stop there. Those in the know at Albany High greet each other by saying: “What’s up, my Obama?” and they respond to a sneeze with “Barack you.” Misbehavior is peer-corrected with the admonition, “Barack’s in the White House,” which translates, “Show some respect.”

Deborah Tannen, professor of linguistics at Georgetown University, said it was “just really stunning” that kids were co-opting the president’s name as a term of endearment and identification.

“This is the most emblematic, positive thing that kids could say,” she said. “It’s connecting them to him, saying that there’s something special in the connection between them.”

I know H.L. Mencken would have written a long entry about this in his History of the English Language, had he only lived to see it.

But while we’re on the topic, I’d just like to clarify one thing:

If I meet a hot butch woman in a white t-shirt and faded jeans skimming over an ass that looks like it could snap a #2 pencil, and I think to myself, “Hello, My Bush!” – I’m not thinking of George.

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Oprah On Lesbians… Again

oprahOprah apparently has a hard time getting her head around lesbianism, and yet it seems she’s also completely fascinated by the topic. Still, it’s hard to believe that anyone with the level of exposure to media, pop culture, and people that she has, can be such a dumb-ass.

Check out this interview with Dr. Lisa Diamond, author of Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women’s Love and Desire (who’s kind of hot, BTW) on the show “Women Leaving Men For Other Women” (Uh, Oprah, we call that “coming out”.) Bless you, Dr. Diamond, for your patience!

Oprah’s tabloid fascination with lesbians seems especially ironic because she has battled rumors for years that she’s in a relationship with her BFF Gayle King. I’d like to think she’s really in a secret three-way with Queen Latifah and Dolly Parton.

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Send Yves St. Laurent to Indiana, Please!

lesmokingUpdate: The school district has reversed its policy that barred a female student from wearing a tuxedo to her school’s prom. The district superintendent has said formal attire will be required at the prom, but the requirements won’t be “gender-based.” However, he said the School Board would have to vote Tuesday to accept the agreement. The ACLU legal director told The Indianapolis Star that the teen is pleased with the decision and will attend the April prom in a tuxedo.

A 17-year-old lesbian in Indiana filed a lawsuit because her principal said she couldn’t wear a tuxedo to the prom.

This only goes to prove that Indiana is provincial in two entirely different ways:

1. Binary gender thinking

and perhaps even worse,

2. Very bad fashion sense. The late Yves St. Laurent spent a career making variations on what he called “Le Smoking” (as in “smoking jacket” ). Some of these tuxedos were frilly, some were sleek. Some were girly, and some were downright butch (yum). All of them were beautifully made, expensive as hell, accepted in polite society, and are now iconic.

Apparently Vogue never made it to newsstands in the Hoosier state, or there wouldn’t be silly discussions about whether girls can wear tuxedos.

While the ACLU was seeking an injunction that would allow the girl to wear a tuxedo, school officials were debating whether she could wear a women’s “pantsuit” instead. I assume, by this, they were picturing the kind of neutral, sexless thing usually worn by WNBA coaches during games and by lesbian attorneys for press conferences.

Would someone out there who has some taste and style dust off a “Le Smoking” and loan it to this kid in Indiana? The state obviously needs some fashion education and it seems she’s just the one to provide it.

And, while I’m at it, how smoking hot is this this 1975 Helmut Newton photograph of an Yves St. Laurent Le Smoking?

lesmoking2

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Off to the Academy Awards… Sort Of

So, things are in a bit of a flurry at my house. We’re starting a quick primping and preening process before heading out to the Academy of Friends annual awards gala. AOF is a San Francisco organization that exists with a single purpose – to throw an amazing Academy Awards party (probably the biggest outside of Hollywood), and distribute the proceeds to AIDS service organizations in the Bay Area. Of course, it’s more complicated than I’m making it, but that’s the basic part of what AOF has been doing for 29 years, and lots of people have benefited from the support of thousands of party-goers over the years.

This year’s bash will be especially fun for my sweetie and me: Because of a travel glitch between Christmas and New Year’s, we ended up at home instead of in New York as planned. So with a week off and time counting down on my annual pass to the local movie house, we went to the movies… lots of them. We’re feeling pretty well informed for tonight’s do. However, it goes without saying that we’ll all be holding our breath for Milk. When that film wins an award (and I know it will), imagine how much fun it will be in a huge San Francisco room full of gay men? There’s no place I’d rather be!

Back to the readying… sheer black stockings and lizard slingback heels (me), polished boots (her), pearls (me), black velvet v-neck (her), white dinner jacket (me), hair product (her), and lipstick (that would be me).

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ABC’s All-Femme Super Wedding

bianca-reeseAs the ability of same-sex couples to marry in California stands in the hands of a state Supreme Court decision yet again, one Hollywood lesbian couple will be married with fanfare and an estimated 2 million guests – or viewers.

In February, marriage equality will be coming to ABC’s All My Children, when Bianca, Erica Kane’s lesbian daughter, marries her partner Reese. (Or doesn’t . . . you know how those soap operas go.)

On February 13 and 16, All My Children’s gay super couple, Reese and Bianca are planning to tie the lesbian knot. It will be a historic milestone for daytime TV as no other gay soap couple has ever walked down the aisle.

The story is already getting major coverage and snagged the coveted cover of Soap Opera Digest.

An of course, in true Hollywood tradition, it’ll be a femme-on-femme wedding with all the frilly trimming. (After all, we’ve got to introduce middle-America to lesbian culture slooowly.)

You can read more in the San Francisco Examiner.

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Move On, Again

rowhouse

Fiction

The cab pulled up in front of the red brick rowhouse.

Andy heard it arrive and rushed to the window to watch through the lace curtain. The young woman who clambered out of the car was bundled in a down jacket and a knit scarf with rainbow stripes. She heaved a dufflebag out of the back and strapped it across her body, messenger-style, and then pushed her dreads back out of her face. She pulled off a glove to take a piece of paper out of her pocket and stood, looking up at the house, comparing addresses.

Andy opened the front door. “Hey there,” she said. “I think you’ve got the right place.”

The woman climbed the steps and held out her hand. “Hi, I’m Malika.” Her breath puffed clouds in the cold, dry air.

“Andy. Come on in before we both freeze.”

Malika put down her bag in the entryway. “Wow, it’s nice and warm in here.” She unwound the scarf and unzipped her jacket.

“Just throw them on the couch,” Andy said. “Can I make you some tea?”

“That would be awesome. I was born and raised in California, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt anything this cold in my life.”

“Even for D.C., this is pretty darn cold.” Andy said over her shoulder as she headed into the kitchen.

Malika followed her.

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